Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
