Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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