ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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