I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
