Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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