At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
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