I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Randomize
