Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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