what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
My life is pants optional.
Randomize