Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Another day, another engagement, another cat
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
40s are totally the cure
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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