your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize