Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize