He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
