ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
