I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
