he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
