I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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