Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Randomize
