You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
