I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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