Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize
