I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
