I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
