i barfeds in our rink
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
