Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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