how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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