operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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