Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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