i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I want to be your penis for a week.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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