oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
