actually, I'm a sock model
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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