I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Randomize
