I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
