There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
