Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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