I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize