have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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