There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
