i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Dick very happy bro
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
