Just cropdusted the office
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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