He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
