ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
