Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
