I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
