he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
