I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
