It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Randomize
