Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Randomize
