you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Randomize
