He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize